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Tune Into This

By SAM VERMA, sophomore

Let’s face it: the 21st Century drastically changed the music industry. Artists like Eminem, One Direction, Lady Gaga, and so many more replaced musical giants such as the Beatles, Madonna, and Queen. Ask an eight year old kid what they think Led Zeppelin is, and they’ll respond back with, “Oh yeah, I think I’ve heard of that video game.” Meanwhile, that same kid can easily recognize the voice and lyrics of Ariana Grande and Katy Perry. Despite all this, there’s one question that’s on everyone’s mind:

Is music really better than it was decades ago?

The answer, of course, has no right or wrong answer. Adults nowadays will denounce today’s music, calling it “pop trash” and a disgrace to true music of the 20th century. Conversely, children today will retort by saying adults simply haven’t transitioned into the modern 21st century.

There’s no denying, however, that the style of music “got flipped-turned upside down” (Will Smith, Fresh Prince of Bel-Air) throughout the decades. The 1900s was home to arguably some of the most inspiring and thought-provoking songs in the history of music.

The Beatles emphasized in Strawberry Fields Forever, “Living is easy with eyes closed, misunderstanding all you see.”

Queen proudly exclaimed to the world, “And bad mistakes, I’ve made a few. I’ve had my share of sand kicked in my face – But I’ve come through” in their hit song We are the Champions.

In Imagine, John Lennon clarifies “You, you may say I’m a dreamer, but I’m not the only one”.

While I am an avid listener of modern music and prefer it over the music of the past, it’s no secret that some of today’s song lyrics are rather… questionable.

Note: Keep in mind that because some of these songs have vulgar lyrics, they have been replaced with family-friendly words in parentheses.

  • “(They) try to bite my style, but my style a jalapeno” -Lil Wayne, Days and Days

Incredible symbolism by Lil Wayne; The jalapeno is a representation of his burning passion for music and others attempting to impede upon this passion are left dumbfounded by his innate skill at rapping.

  • “We in two different cities, Minnesota and Philly” -Freeway, Best @ it

Hey Siri, where is Minnesota located? * show a picture of the US map*

Hmm, well that’s weird. Apparently Minnesota is a state.

  • “Weezy F. Baby and the ‘F’ is for phenomenal.” -Lil Wayne, Yes

phenomenal [fi-nom-uh-nl] (adj.) highly extraordinary or prodigious; exceptional

It’s an understandable mistake, Lil Wayne. You get an A for ephort.

  • “Tomorrow is Saturday and Sunday comes afterwards” -Rebecca Black, Friday

Does that mean Saturday comes before Sunday? And what comes after Sunday? When does it end!?

  • “If the light is off, then it isn’t on” -Hilary Duff, So Yesterday

In other news, forecasters hypothesize that it is indeed not raining when the sun is shining.

  • “(Flippin) magnets, how do they work?” -Insane Clown Posse, Miracles

Scientists believe that the unlike poles of a magnet are attracted to each other as a result of their magnetic force.

  • “Look up in the sky, it’s a bird, it’s a plane, Nah, it’s just me.” -Pitbull, Timber

Pitbull once again provokes listeners to ponder complex philosophical questions: What is perception? Do we all see objects the same way? What if one man’s illusion is another man’s reality?

  • “You wanna hug me, Hey, hey, hey, What rhymes with hug me? Hey, hey, hey” -Robin Thicke, Blurred Lines

Many words, actually. If you’ll excuse me, I’ll go play some rugby with my puppy against a mummy who has no money.

  • “Yeah, baby, you finer than your fine cousin. And your cousin fine” -Drake, Shut it Down

BREAKING NEWS! Following up on our previous revelation, 2MZ discovered footage of Drake and this unidentified cousin walking home together after a concert! The rapper’s previous lover is distraught, losing her boyfriend to her ‘fine’ cousin. Oh the drama!

If you’ve enjoyed any laughs with these lyrics, it means that technically, these artists did do their job as “entertainers,” albeit not the kind of entertainment they were aiming for. At least they should get credit for trying? And for convincing millions of unsuspecting innocents to purchase their “works of art,” of course. Still, at least they didn’t repeat the same word over and over and over again, right? Oh wait…

  •         “Cake, cake, cake, cake Cake, cake, cake, cake Cake, cake, cake, cake Cake, cake, cake.” -Rihanna, Birthday Cake

(Featured image from apple.com)

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