Features / News

It’s Getting Hot In Here


Three years ago, the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change (IPCC) estimated that sea levels could rise 7 to 23 inches by the end of the century. This change in sea level is just the tip of the global warming iceberg. (Following these estimates, scientists predict that many significant territories, including Florida and Washington D.C., will be the first to sink underwater.) However, do not lose hope, for the the root causes of global warming can be reduced and eradicated. Better yet, if we follow some simple steps, we will surely solve this major world problem.

First, let’s talk about air. It is important to recognize that the main problems associated with global warming are caused by greenhouse gases, the most common of which is carbon dioxide. According to a global study, 100% of all carbon emissions result from the release of carbon dioxide into the atmosphere. One easy fix deals with your daily habits. Out of the 36 gigatonnes of carbon dioxide released in 2013, the majority was produced by humans. The correlation is clear: just by breathing, humans are causing Earth to spiral into a hot mess. On average, a person takes roughly sixteen breaths per minute. There is no need for a person to be this wasteful. If we each lower our respiration rates to three breaths per minute, we will drastically reduce our collective carbon footprint. Furthermore, breathing carbon dioxide instead of oxygen shouldn’t be too hardif a plant can do it, so can you!

If you don’t feel like changing your lifestyle to support the green movement, there are plenty of other easy solutions you can implement to help the environment. One way is to cool the sea. First, get a cup, fill it with ocean water, and put it in your fridge. After a couple of hours, take the cold water and pour it back into the ocean. Repeat this simple process several times; be careful not to cool too much of the ocean at oncea frozen ocean is just as unpleasant as a boiling one. Remember to recycle the cup when you are finished.

Aside from individual contributions, some solutions require the cooperation of entire nations. In the U.S., we can implement alternative energy sources by holding presidential elections every two years. Through these elections, we will be able to harness all of the hot air that politicians release and convert it to clean, efficient energy. Through world-wide efforts, we can bring back the Cold War; credible sources estimate that doing so will lower global temperatures by as much as ten degrees over the next year. Furthermore, with the reintroduction of the United States into NAFTA (North American Freezing Temperatures Association), North America will be frostier than your teacher is when you forget your homework. If we follow the footsteps of the past, we will be able to make future strides against global warming.

Global warming is a serious problem, and we need to unite to stop it. We must first recognize that global warming has massive repercussions; for instance, the increase in global temperatures has forced us to warm up to terrible things such as Justin Bieber. However, no problem, no matter how hot or cold, cannot be solved. If we act now and try these simple solutions, we might be able to reduce carbon emissions by an unprecedented one percent over the next seventy years.

Image Source: http://www.wrsc.org/sites/default/files/global_warming_0.jpg

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